When I was 5 years old, my older brothers, once again, tried to get me into trouble. My dad came home from work every night at the exact same time, 5:30pm. On this particular night, my brothers told me to tell my dad “fuck you” when he came home.
“What does that mean?”
“It means you love him.”
Armed with this new-found word, I excitedly waited for my dad to come home. When he opened the door at 5:30 pm, I happily yelled “FUCK YOU!” He grabbed me, raced me upstairs, and put soap in my mouth. I cried hysterically, told him what happened, and he grounded my brothers for a week.
Lessons learned? 1. “Fuck you” doesn’t mean “I love you.” 2. Never trust my brothers.
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